Have you ever been in one of those situations where your hesitant to speak up about something important that is really upsetting you, or being imposed on you? I hate this stuff...I feel awkward not just because of the subject of my discontentment but overall the fact that I even have to bring it to light because it really shouldn't even be an issue...plus its not just some random person that I have the problem with...its someone I have known for a long time.
Its like you drop hints in your actions and comments...you try to lead by example, until literally its the only thing you find yourself wanting to discuss!!
For some reason you continue to put it off and of course it just begins to piss you off, and the silence doesn't help even though you think the silence should be taken as yet another hint of your agitation...and the revolving door continues because you just don't have the guts to say something...why am I like this?!
Why can't I just say what it is I want to say...? Its not like I don't have the right to say it...and I do. I have grounds to be upset right now and irritated and fed up and not wanting to live a certain way because its just not the way I live...and yet here I swallowing and settling and keeping my mouth shut for fear of hurting someone else and their feelings...this is what I mean by I have an issue with putting myself first instead of others ALL THE TIME.
If anyone has suggestions on how to change this annoying practice of mine...please feel free to comment...Urgh!